Sister Beth was much younger than the other sisters and her nun’s habit was completely different from the older nuns. Sister Beth was considered to be a more progressive nun with a background in teen/child psychology. Sister Beth was a music lover and told her class that every chance she got. She would sing every morning as she opened the drapes to let the sun in, was one of the leaders of the choir, and was teaching the choir modern harmonizing techniques. Once a week she would leave the class for an hour to instruct choir and take most every girl in the class (the boys were also welcome in choir but chose not to attend). Sister Beth told the little friends that every choir is different and every voice has their own perfect sound that needed to be found through proper harmonizing and scaling of the octaves. Perhaps if Mike O was in her class she may have even let him sing out loud as she found promise in everyone’s voice.
Her love of music was introduced into learning whenever possible. In the first two weeks the class got to listen to Seals and Crofts, Cat Stevens, Andrew Lloyd Webber, and even Deep Purple as she related the lyrics in the songs to something she was teaching (which actually did help the little friends at least pay attention to her course studies). For example, Sister Beth would play Cat Stevens ‘Morning Has Broken’ as a song about evolution and then after hearing the song would discuss Darwin and his theory. Sister Beth knew the psychology of adolescent students and did her best to appeal to the little friends at their level – which was just fine with the little friends.
The classroom responded very warmly to Sister Beth and comments such as “Sister Beth was the best, most hip of all nuns”, “She is a great teacher”, and “I like Sister Beth a lot and I love her spunk” were everyday occurrences. It was a pretty good mix with the little friends and Sister Beth and everyone enjoyed her. But like their 7th grade teacher who hid in the closet the past year, Sister Beth would be put to the test by the little friends.
In another room in the senior building someone put paint in a girl’s hair. Normally this would not even be mentioned since it wasn’t in Sister Beth’s class except that it was Sister Beth’s class that got the blame, even though no one from the class was present in the room when this incident occurred. The little friends got in enough trouble as it is and did not need to be blamed for things they didn’t do. All the boys in Sister Beth’s class were in the Principal’s office and this was a first, even for them. The Principal told the class she knew one of the little friends had “did it” and when the class tried to explain that they were not even in the girl’s class they were told not to speak unless spoken to.
This false accusation infuriated the entire class as it was so blatantly obvious that no one in the class could have done this. Unfortunately Sister Beth got caught in the crossfire when some of the little friends retaliated against what they felt was an injustice. When Sister Beth’s class began a couple days later and Sister Beth opened the drapes singing her song, the windows had playboy pictures taped on it from the outside. Sister Beth’s singing trailed off and she tried putting her hands over the pictures so the class would not see it until she shut the shades. She then turned around to face the class and said in a very stern voice. “Masturbation is Wrong, it is Wrong because it is not Shared”!
While most of the class was dead silent at this time and had no idea what she was talking about, there was one faint sound right after she said this. Someone responded by saying “Weeeee” in a high voice. The voice was soft, but it was heard clearly due to the dead silence caused by Sister Beth’s masturbation comment. In fact, it was like a verbal exclamation point being placed after the word to put emphasis on what she had just said, and the little friends liked it.
Sister Beth may have been looking for the perfect sound but it was the little friends who found it. Within a week most of the class was using the verbal exclamation points after certain words such as “blow” or “windy” or “ball”, etc. Say a word such as that and you would hear several voices going “Weeeee” or “Ayyyhhh” and the always reliable “Heeaaaaaa”.
Within two weeks most of the boys in the class were using the verbal exclamation points after nearly any word. For example, “may I borrow a pencil” would elicit a high pitch “Heeaaaaaa, they want my pencil” or “could you ring the bell” would elicit a “Weeeee, he wants to ring my bell”. The short phrases would then be followed by a choir of “weeee’s and ahhhs” from the rest of the male class. What they did to the title of “Huck Finn” cannot even be printed. This was the boy’s version of choir practice and the classroom was their cathedral.
Within three weeks most of the boys in the class were using the verbal exclamation points now after physically touching someone, especially the top of the head. A soft touch to the head, followed by a “weeee” began making its rounds through the class. This eventually morphed into pushing the head down to waist level and saying “heeaaaaa” which then morphed into pushing the head down to waist level, jumping up and down, and saying “ayyyhhhhh”.
Sometimes the person pushing down the head would then pass the head on to another in a sort of “tag team” action. The tag team was actually a remnant act from their days in the junior building when they would emulate their favorite wrestlers of the day such as Dick the Bruiser, The Sheik, Bobo Brazil, etc. Let us be clear, just like with the simulated wrestling acts the person who was getting his head pushed down was not upset, this person would bide his time till he caught his tormenters and would bring the same fate on them. Heaven help the student who dropped his pen or pencil and bent over to pick it up, he would be swarmed like piranhas to a feast.
This obviously did not occur while the teacher was watching, but should she step out or turn her back to write on the chalk board, you would hear soft “weeeees” and “heeeaaas” coming from the class.
Soon a whole new dialect was being developed. For example, one student would say “Hey Joe, you’re fired” and Joe had to say the return line “Hey Bill, your hired” and the class would erupt in chorus of weeee’s and heeeaaa’s at this witty exchange of words.
Another new dialect was the “speak into the mike” routine. This would happen if someone said something negative to a little friend. The little friend would then do an “upside down ok sign” (for lack of a better way to describe it that won’t be offensive) and ask the person to “speak into the mike”. This would soon evolve as well. Eventually if someone said anything to a little friend, even a compliment, they could be confronted with the dreaded “upside down ok sign” and asked to speak into that person’s mike.
Sister Beth knew something was going on in her class, but was not exactly sure what. So in a very special “Top Secret” meeting she went to the students she could trust the most – the choir girls in the Class of ’75.
Sister Beth took some of these girls aside and asked them point blank what was up with the “weeee”ing and pushing the heads down to waist level.
This put the girls in an awkward position, and none of them could say it outright to her, so they began to spell it for her.
“Sister, they are trying to say” ……. “B” as Sister Beth listened intently.
“I” as the girls continued, still very hesitant as they were talking to a nun.
“T” and before the girls could continue Sister Beth interrupted them.
“B.I.T.C.H. Sister Beth spelled out, are they saying that word”? Sister Beth asked the class very calmly, well aware of how difficult this was for the girls to do. The word bitch would actually make a little sense to Sister Beth since the name Beth and bitch were very close in sound and spelling.
“No Sister” came the reply as the girls continued to spell out letters.
“E” said the girls, “That completes the first word Sister”.
The girls continued with the last two letters to spell the last word.
“M and E” said the girls, wanting to get this over quickly.
Sister Elizabeth then spoke the word “Bite Me” out loud in a somewhat confused way. They are actually saying “Bite Me” when they do that?”
The girls in the class nodded and there were a few giggles from them as they could see the “it’s all clear to me now” look on Sister Beth’s face.
Sister Beth knew she had to put an end to this.
The boys in the class also assumed that Sister Beth would try to put an end to this, but the boys also felt that she probably did not know how. It’s a foregone conclusion that this behavior pattern was not in any of her psych classes, much less how to deal with it. Not only did her students make the noises during class, they did it during lunch hour nearly constantly and people were watching, other nuns were watching, and worse of all potential new parishioners were watching.
There were reasons St. Albert the Great had a hair code and a strict dress code and one of those reasons was for new potential parishioners. The boys would all wear white shirts, black pants, black shoes, and a black tie while the girls would wear plaid skirts, white blouse, and white socks. When prospective new families would come to St. Albert the Great for a tour, they expected to see a tower of learning by disciplined students. “Sure the public schools are free” the St. Albert representative would tell the young parents “but what are you going to do when your daughter wants to wear a halter top to class or wears shorts a little too tight?” “What are you going to do when your son wants to grow his hair long?”
At St. Albert the Great there were never any such worries for new parents and the couple would then be given a list of stores that would supply the “uniforms” that the students wore and that way the couple could see for themselves how inexpensive the clothes were and that savings alone would more than pay the modest monthly charge of St. Albert the Great School.
To close the deal with the prospective families, the representative would take the parents outside the school during lunch hour so that they could see for themselves how happy the children were. The youngest children playing gleefully on the swings and monkey bars, the girls skipping rope, the boys playing soccer in the parking lot, the girls playing hopscotch, and there, right over there, in the middle of the park, the little friends and company pushing every ones head down and squealing like banshees.
Oh yes, the little friends knew their behavior could not be tolerated; they knew it was simply a matter of how and when Sister Beth (or even the dreaded principal) would address it.
They did not have to wait long as Sister Beth did confront the situation head on and she did it cleverly. At her weekly choir rehearsal she decided to bring the whole class to the choir to sing. The little friends groaned but they were sure they were only going there to sing Christmas songs and going to the choir loft was not that bad. The staircase was at the front of the Church and the stairs would creak as you made your way up to the loft. As the class made their way up, some would turn around and quickly push down the head of the classmate behind them which was easy since they were already one step higher. A whispered “weeee” would be heard echoing against the tight stairwell walls. Once at the top you had a spectacular view of the Church, especially the giant cross in the center right behind the altar.
Sister Beth had everyone settle in then tapped with her conductor’s wand on the small podium there and told the students to quiet down, turn to page 55 in the Missalette, and then everyone began singing the first song. The song she picked to sing had a chorus that went as follows.
The boys in the class nearly blew a gasket, with a parade of giggles and strange sounds being elicited from the class. Sister Beth stopped the song and asked calmly “What is so funny about the word blow?”
You could hear the boys struggling to keep it in. They were in a Church after all and did not want to do anything disrespectful to God, but they also had been conditioned to respond to this word for the past several weeks and the muffled sounds you heard now reminded you of an engine that could not start. The sounds were there but they were more of a primitive guttural response as the boys groaned.
“What is that, what are you trying to say to me when you make those noises?” The giggles were stopping now as Sister Beth said “alright let’s try it again”.
The boys were literally churning in their seats when they heard this, they could not take another round of this song especially in a Church. Then the truth of the matter became quite evident to them. They were being exorcised by Sister Beth. The little friends who always sat together quickly buried their heads toward the floor. They tried to clear their mind of thoughts and dared not look at each other for fear of breaking out in uncontrolled laughter.
“Look up” said sister, “eyes forward” and the little friends slowly elevated their heads and saw Sister Beth with her wand. They had been taught to always look forward while they sang and only look down during pauses and only then if they had forgotten the words and needed to see them in the Missalette.
“Let’s begin again” said Sister Beth and the choir again began to sing with a distinctly more female sound as most of the boys were not singing but contemplating the upcoming chorus and how to make it through it without laughing.
“Blow ‘heeaaaa’, Blow ‘heeaaa’…” the wand came down on the podium as Sister Beth said in a calm yet stern voice “Stop it, stop doing that”.
That drew a murmur from the choir and it was coming from some of the girls who were whispering at the boys to ‘knock it off’ and then made statements questioning the boy’s maturity in the class. This was textbook stuff from Sister Beth. Divide and conquer and the little friends respected her for that. No other teacher would have tried to tackle this subject but Sister Beth was hitting it head on and making her point to them.
Sister Beth tapped the podium with the wand again and was preparing to try and sing this song for the third time when a voice came from the Church below. It was a student with the new Monthly Missalettes and she was removing the old and putting in the new and she wanted to know if Sister Beth had a moment for her to do the choir loft. Sister Beth replied “of course” to the student as the class all received the new December Missalette which included many of the songs that would be sung at Christmas. This was the break the boys needed to compose themselves and gather their wit.
When Sister Beth tapped again with her wand she said that she wanted to practice the Christmas songs. With three taps on the podium the class began singing and it went well. The little friends were saved but they would remember this moment as this small, spunky nun had them on the ropes. She did this without a “stingleman” or threat of being sent to the office. Sister Beth was brilliant!
Things were different after that for the remainder of their 8th and final year at St. Albert the Great School. While the noises and sounds never went completely away, they mellowed out for the rest of the year as Sister Beth now knew how to deal with them when they popped up – by addressing the noises and sounds directly to the class.
One example of how Sister Beth “addressed the noises and sounds directly” happened during a science class. Sister Beth enjoyed science almost as much as music and this day she was doing a science experiment with several test tubes being heated with Bunsen burners. As the experiment progressed she turned toward the chalk board and began drawing test tubes on the chalk board.
Immediately the noises began and Sister Beth calmly said “now now, let’s stop that, I am not drawing penises on the boards”. The class immediately stopped making the noises, all but for a few giggles over a nun saying the word “penis”.
The boys in the class and Sister Beth managed to coexist through the year until Graduation in this manner. As for the “verbal exclamation points” you still may hear or see it, even some decades later when little friends get together and someone happens to say the wrong thing, or sits in the wrong spot for a group photo. It’s simply a conditioned response with some of the little friends, a remnant of a mindset from their days at St. Albert’s the Great School.
